You aren’t making amends to get a specific reaction from someone. After listening and validating, ask if there is anything you can do to right the wrong. This shows that you’re willing to make up for your mistakes and are looking to do what you can to alleviate their pain. For step 9 to be successful, you must be willing to make things right.
Step 8 AA
This shows you understand what you did that hurt the other person. It shows that you are taking responsibility for your behavior. It might be easy to recognize who you’ve hurt with your drinking. But figuring out how to make amends can be a different matter. To complete this step, you must be willing to admit to and face the impacts your past has had on your life and others’ lives. Many AA participants find that dividing up the list you created in the 8th step helps them approach step 9.
What is Celebrate Recovery Step 9?
This ensures we take accountability and make positive changes without causing additional harm in our recovery while making amends to such people we cannot make direct amends to. In recovery, we can make an indirect amend with a person we harmed in the past, who since passed away, by volunteering time to a cause they truly cared about in their life. How you start these conversations depends what is a living amends on your relationship with the person you harmed and the circumstances in which you plan to make direct amends. When making direct amends, it is usually best to do so after a sustained period of sobriety and while in a calm state of mind. However, even if you feel extremely motivated to make direct amends, it is advisable to take your time with this step.
Comprehensive Care
- Working Step 9 is challenging and you’ll likely need support and assistance as you work through it.
- If you have taken these steps in recovery, please leave a comment!
- And some people in your life may not be receptive on your timeline.
- When you cannot directly make up for something to the person you hurt, a living amends is a decision to change your ongoing behavior in a way that is informed by the wrongdoing.
- Be mindful of the potential for harm when reaching out and prepare for any difficult reactions.
- After completing step eight, you’ll have to categorize the names based on the sort of amends you can (or can’t) make.
If you have taken these steps in recovery, please leave a comment! Trust the recovery process and believe in God to truly prosper! Since everyone’s recovery is different, what your journey will look like in regards to making amends will be different from someone else’s journey.
- The goal of this step is to find freedom by cleaning up the past to live peacefully in the present.
- Making amends is challenging, but the outcome can be one of the most rewarding parts of recovery.
- Profess your faith in Christ as our one and only Savior, and receive eternal life.
The part of the amends process whereby we change ourselves has an effect on everyone around us and goes on long after we’ve spoken directly to someone we have harmed. In rare cases, making amends in recovery may inadvertently lead to further harm or negative consequences for the individual or the person receiving the amends. It’s crucial to consider the potential risks carefully and work closely with a sponsor or therapist to navigate these situations. Making amends is more than just apologizing, though apologizing is part of it. It’s rebuilding trust, correcting a mistake, and improving the relationship with the person you hurt. It’s recognizing that you did something wrong and actively changing your behavior for the better.
For instance, someone who used to spend the holidays drunk might see showing up to every holiday sober as part of their living amends to their family. Similarly, a parent could do their best to prove to their kids that they’re sober and planning to stay marijuana addiction this way. Once you have completed step 9, it’s time to move on to step 10. Step 10 in AA asks you to take a personal inventory of how far you’ve come. It also asks you to reflect on where you are in the present and your day-to-day life.
